Time stands still

 This pretty lady was 23 and had her whole life ahead of her. In a happy relationship, about to finish school and start her new career. She was happy and hopeful and looked beautiful on this day. Had lots to learn and lots of growing up to do. A kind and loving woman who was trying to figure out who she was.

This pretty lady - more than 20 years later - now 44 and has had a great life. Very blessed with 3 amazing kids and a strong family support system. Had many happy years with the father of her kids and made so many memories doing fun things together. Has an amazing career she really enjoys all these years later. She is going through a tough time right now, but is determined to make the most of this next chapter of life and find true peace and happiness. 

I try to take photos with my kids on my birthday. Here are two I could find - this was 2020.

And this year - 5 years later.

Motivation Monday - My Reasons

Words to live by in this season of life.

Every day I get up and try my best. Some days I get lots done and I meet everyone's needs and demands, and on some days I just barely get through the day. People ask me almost every day how I'm doing and I always say, I'm surviving. 

I look forward to the day (hopefully in the near future) where I can say that we are all thriving. We aren't there yet, but I have hope that we will get there.

These 3 have my whole heart. One day I will write about each of them and how incredible they are. Those that know and love them are lucky. Every day I feel lucky to be their Mom. I realize I don't share nearly enough photos of them, so here they are.

Learning how to do the clock at hockey...and killing it! A job that many adults are afraid to do and this little lady sat down and was a rockstar at it.

Our bronze medal winning boy! Played an incredible home tournament with his 13C team. One more away tournament next week in Comox and then hopefully the Stars one in town at the end of March and then his season will be over. 

Our biggest guy with his D partner and buddy Carson at the hot dog sale yesterday. His smile just warms my Mama heart.

And one of all 3 just because - Super sweet moment captured yesterday! Teaching sister how to play baseball so she's ready when her season starts in a few weeks. Yes, for the first time ever, all 3 Barrows will be playing baseball so our evenings from April - June will be jam packed.

 

Just because - the true beauty of where we live

We live in the most beautiful place...and love having a gorgeous view of the sunsets. This photo doesn't even do it justice. 

I am loving the weather and spring evenings with the kids. Tonight we didn't have any sports and we spent time together going for a walk, baking cupcakes for Jordie's birthday party, and just laughing and having fun. The countdown is on till the end of school and baseball season and I can't wait for more quiet evenings together :) 

A really sweet moment captured!

Big brother reading his favorite Franklin books to little sister. He is so good to her and she just adores him. The time and effort that he puts into this relationship with her is really sweet to see, and I see some real similarities between these two and me and my middle brother.

I hope she looks back on these photos one day and really truly realizes how much he loves her, and I hope he realizes how much she looks up to him.

Loving the story I'm living now

My blog popped into my head today and I knew I hadn't done a post in a long time, but I had no idea how long it had been. To say the last 6 months was crazy for us would be an understatement. 

Within days of my last post back in May we decided to list our house to sell it, we moved, boys had a busy baseball season, we camped a bunch, we worked a ton, we paddle boarded and swam the summer away, then came the fall with way more sports than we expected and a last minute decision to quit my job and move into something new.

It has been absolutely insanely busy and at times overwhelming, but also so filled with love and memories that I wouldn't change for the world.

April 1st and spring is in the air!

Another day and another walk for this Mama! I am committed to getting out every day and the sunshine makes this so much easier. I throw on my bluetooth headphones, comfy runners and off I go. Sometimes it's a long walk, sometimes I take some of my people with me, and sometimes I just go by myself and only walk around the block. I have wanted for YEARS to make daily exercise a priority in my life but have never been successful at it. I always felt like if it couldn't be a long walk then what was the point, and once a day or two went by that I didn't do it then I just decided to say to hell with it and give up. This time I'm taking it day by day and if I don't want to do it I tell myself to just walk around the block, just 10 minutes. Just do something to move my body and take a few minutes to breathe and just be me. I am LOVING the new time I'm spending and feel value in myself and my life like I never quite have before. And a deep appreciation for all that my body has done for me over the past 40 years and being committed to staying active for the rest of my years!

 

Truth Tuesday - This one speaks to me in a big way

Wow, I haven't seen a meme on Facebook that spoke so to my heart like this one has in a long time. THIS explains how I feel about the past year of my life perfectly. I feel like I have (along with my hubby) worked really hard to evaluate who I am and more importantly who I want to be in the future. 

I have worked very hard over the past year (or maybe two) to really look hard at who I am, what I bring to my relationships with people, and to the world around me. I have some pretty serious faults about me and things that I don't love, but also find hard to change too. I can be incredibly selfish at times, but also extremely giving too. It's about figuring out a balance that works for me to live the most positive life that I can, by both giving what I can without resentment and taking what I need without feeling guilt. 

I know I still have a long way to go to being the great human that I remind my kids every day that we all should be. I want to be the example of that human and I want them to be proud of who I am and who I was for them throughout their lives. I want to be a positive role model for a happy and healthy attitude and lifestyle.

I may have a long way still to go, but for now and today I'm celebrating how far I've come in my journey to being a better person than I was before. I am never going to stop working at being better. It's a new way of life for me and a focus that I plan to keep in the forefront of my mind through all of the ups and downs that come my way in life. It isn't always easy, but I am committed to staying focused, one day at a time! 

James said I was wrong

He said that my post saying that he didn't want to be in pictures wasn't true, it's just that I don't ask him as often anymore as I used to. I suppose that's probably true, and mainly because when we do things as a family or me with the kids he's usually off doing something away from me. Whether that's playing hockey while I'm with Kennedy at the playground, or far away from me at the beach, or whatever the case may be. But he wanted me to put it here on this blog that he is NOT against me taking or sharing his photo on here. So he willingly smiled for this cute start of spring break selfie with his Mama. 

Another reason why he isn't in as many photos...he is always on some sort of electronic every single chance he gets! This is a typical James pose these days. Playing on the switch :) 

Also a typical cheesy pose I get when I do ask him for a photo! 

The other thing this kid spends his time doing....EATING and DRINKING everything in sight! Lord help us when he actually hits the teen years because it's already shocking how much he can eat at not even 11 yet :)  YIKES! 

I love you my sweet Jamesy boy! Keep smiling for your photo happy Mama and remember your promise to me that you will always be nice to me, even when you hit those awful hormonal teen years! 

Fave Photo Friday - a quiet photo week in my world

So, most people maybe take a few photos a week I imagine. I usually take a ton more than that but this week has been really busy for me and I found when I sat down to do this post there just weren't nearly as many to choose from, and again none of James! I really need to get one of him soon :) Of course Kennedy is in the most because this tiny little human is attached at my hip and loves to be where I am. 

Can anyone notice something that is different about me this week between some of the photos? 

My handsome hubby and me.

Aaaawwww my new favorite spot...when it's not cold and windy especially! 

Early morning Mom hair brushing by my Jordie boy.

A random snap but she looks so natural in this photo and I love it

My new again favorite snack. Trying to avoid the chips and candy after dinner and this is helping.

My happy place...never in a million years thought that I would fall in love with yoga like I have this past year.

The kids start spring break tonight and they are all so excited that their dad is on holidays with them so I'm sure they will all get up to some fun stuff while I'm working! 

Sunday Smiles

Jordie boy - I hope you always want to snuggle up with your mama for a visit and a silly little selfie.  

And always want to snuggle up with your Daddy at bedtime too. 

Windy Sunday afternoon and we tried to find some beach glass at Airplane park beach but no such luck! 

ooohhh my handsome hubby shaved off his beard this weekend! And we snuck out on Sunday morning for an awesome 45 minute walk through the neighbourhood near our house! 

And just like that...another year of hockey is DONE!! 

Didn't get to snap a picture of James on his last of hockey day yesterday as he didn't actually go on the ice and when he got his puck from his coach I was busy helping hand out donuts :) I'll have to snap one of him though to share. When I looked through my photos from the weekend he didn't appear in any except this one at the park playing catch with his brother. He is much more resistant to having his photo taken and I understand and appreciate that. My kids always have a say in what I post about them on social media and this blog. 

I look forward to so many more beach and park outings in our future. The winter flew by this year and we are all looking forward to sunshine and baseball season coming up! 

Photo Friday - a new me

I have not stepped foot in a gym since before I had kids but I knew it was something I wanted to try and see what I thought. 

Yesterday when the boys were doing skateboarding at the complex I booked in for the gym for an hour and I loved it! I did the bike and the treadmill and really enjoyed my quiet time with my music blaring and time to think. I see many more hours in my future spent there and looking forward to feeling my best self. I really don't give a damn about the number on the scale anymore, I care way more about how it makes me feel, and that's a hell of a long way for me to have come over the last decade. 

Slow and steady for this girl. I'm not out to win a race or anything, just out to get my body moving more consistently.

Truth Tuesday - putting myself first sometimes does not make me a bad mom

I spent the first 29 years of my life putting myself first and the next 10 putting my kids first. Now that we’re in a new stage of life I’m working hard to find a good balance between the two. I'm finding and making time for me, with daily walks and Aquafit and yoga classes as often as I can get them in while also finding myself more engaged with my kids as well. 

I can truly say that I am the happiest and healthiest that I've ever been since becoming a mom almost 11 years ago. Making time for me makes me a better mom because I have more patience for them and for myself. I can admit that at times I felt resentful for not having any time alone to do things for me. In my opinion, after they are in bed DOES NOT count because by then I'm exhausted and over touched and overstimulated and don't want to do anything for anyone else or myself. Now I don't feel that way at all anymore. Even 20 minutes alone to walk and listen to music and think just clears my head and makes me feel able to tackle the rest of my day and makes me so proud of myself.

There are still days that I don't want to do anything, but by forcing myself to do even just a short walk I'm proving to myself that I am worth the time and effort. I'm so damn proud of myself and how far I've come with my physical and my mental health over the last 2 years. I have worked really hard to become the most authentic and true version of myself. I am loving my 40's so far and am determined it's going to be my best decade ever. 

 

New favourite snack!

I’m embarrassed to say how many of these snacks I’ve eaten over the past two days! Seriously such a yummy snack. The saltiness of the pretzels paired with the creaminess of the tzatziki makes it an unmatched treat! 

Ladies...buy yourself the flowers!

These $3.49 tulips have made my whole week just a tiny bit brighter and happier. I was shopping at Freshco the other day and came across these 5 beautiful pink tulips and I felt like they signified our family so I bought them and every day I've looked at them I've been glad I did :) 

2021 Crib Tournament - how many games can we play in 365 days?

If you know us at all you will know that Jim and I's favorite way to spend quality time together is to play crib. He taught me how to play when we had only been together less than 6 months and we have played thousands of games together over the years.

This year for our anniversary we splurged and bought this awesome huge crib board off of Wayfair. It comes with a stand that you can use between two chairs but we tend to use it on a table between us instead. It was not cheap but we both agree that it was our best purchase of the whole year! We both think that we played more crib in the last 6 months than we did in the last 2 years. 

Before we had kids we used to write down all of our crib games and even played for points/money (which we never actually gave each other). This year we decided to do a year long tournament with each point being worth 5cents (10cents for each hole if skunked!) Then on January 1, 2022 we'll tally all of our games and see who the ultimate money and game winner is. Then that person gets to go and spend that money on whatever they want....with zero guilt! 

This photo was from our first time playing on the new board! Funny story, it arrived to PR after we had left to Texada for camping, but our awesome friend Dena grabbed it from our porch and brought it over to us when she came for a daytrip visit!

We stole away to Lund the other day for a lunch date (thanks Nana and Papa for taking the kids) and the Boardwalk Restaurant has crib boards so you can play while you wait for your food. Jim kicked my ass and skunked me :( 

This is what a lot of our games here at home look like. A child, or two, around coloring or playing on their tablets or eating. They like to be where we are and we don't mind that one little bit. 

Jim says if yesterday is any indicator (I lost both games we played...I'm not off to a good start) then we should call it the 2021 ass-whooping extravaganza! This was from New Years Eve when he kicked my ass horribly (probably my worst loss in a long time!) Thankfully this skunk doesn’t count as we started the tourney on January 1 😉

Note: I started writing this post yesterday afternoon after we’d played two morning games that I lost, then last night we played two more and I beat him good both games! Not quite a skunk but still both games had significantly more points! 

My bet is on Jim winning this whole thing, but you just never know how the year will play out!

Weekly snapshots of the Barrows family

Now that I've got a new system in place for getting photos onto this blog I am committed to doing more random photo posts with no concern to date order or captions. I take so many photos and so many never get shared. I love these posts just so in the future I will be able to look back and see my kids at every stage of their life. Just like with each of my kids, there are always more of the youngest and far less of the oldest one who tends to do his own thing more and more these days so I'm starting off this post with a photo of him and his daddy at the ball park the other night! 

She is in LOVE with her new dollhouse! Swap and shop win on this one!

FINALLY he is toothless!