James got this toque from Auntie Ra back when he was 2 or 3 and it's been a favorite in our house ever since. Such a cute memory to have something that all 3 of them have worn!
Now here are their individual photos of each of them! James was almost 3 here.
Here is Kennedy at just about 3
This was on Valentine's Day and he wasn't even quite 2 here yet!
When I see pictures like I realize again how much these two look alike!
I was rushing around like a crazy woman the other day (now I can't even remember why or what I was doing), and all of a sudden I noticed the noise level in my house was reduced by one and Jordie was downstairs by himself. A few minutes later he came up and told me he had made something for me. Out came this love note and I was so very touched by it.
It makes me realize once again that no matter how much I feel like I am failing them daily in a variety of ways, in their hearts they KNOW how much I love them and they love me just for being me. I couldn't ask for anything more in my life.
....but that’s exactly what I have turned into! As I walked James down the dressing room tunnel today to get suited up for his factory hockey camp I was struck with this feeling of how I honestly never thought I'd be a hockey mom and now look at me go! I spend 2-3 days a week at the Complex and have finally become comfortable with tying skates and getting them into all the gear correctly!
No one in my family ever played hockey so it was such a foreign concept to me years ago when James told us at 5 that he wanted to start playing, even though he had never skated a single day in his life. In the pre-novice days they encourage parents to go on the ice until the kids can skate and those first few months were so awesome because Jim couldn't really skate much either! Father and son learning to skate together!
Now here we are 4 years later and this big guy has his heart set on being a goalie and I think he might have what it takes to do it. He has a long way to go but we've really seen his passion shift this year as he's been allowed to spend more time as goalie.
I'm actually excited to see what the next year brings for this awesome little man of mine!
This concept was so much fun and as soon as Jenn posted about this kind of mini session I texted her and said that we were in! I knew how much fun the kids would have with the photos, and I was right. All three of them loved it, but none as much as James! He was so excited and totally into the different poses that Jenn had him do to go along with his Lego skateboard park he got for his birthday and spent hours building last weekend.
I had such a hard time deciding which photo to put first on this post....but I settled with the big one of James cause he was just so excited and really did so good with everything that Jenn asked him to do! When I showed him this picture today he was so excited and couldn't believe all the awesome James's that were in one picture!
Next up is my favorite of Jordie! This is the one that Jenn shared on her page and I just love it. This scowl is just so my Jordie boy that it makes me giggle each time I look at it!
And then Ms Kennedy with her Care Bears. I just LOVE the colors of this one best of all.
Now here are the other shots from each of them! I love how Jenn gave us multiple shots because in this series of James I think I love this first one the best of the ones that have just one part of the big photo above. You should have seen him leaning like a pro on that skateboard but the kid is a total klutz and couldn't balance like that even if he tried to!
LOVE IT!
Funny story about this one in particular...James wanted so bad to be climbing on the rock wall but Jenn wasn't sure how easy that would be with positioning him in a way that she could make it look good...but SHE DID IT! He looked so awkward when she was taking the photos but man did she ever work her magic and he looks awesome up there scaling the wall!
This kid is so funny. I swear his session was the shortest and he just listened really well, did his few poses and he was done and off playing with the other kids. He is such a funny little character and he kept laughing and saying that he hoped that Jenn was going to shrink him so he was the same size as his toys :)
These are his AWESOME new remote control cars that he got for his birthday. I'm not kidding, if you want to get your kids a cheap but amazing RC car, buy these ones! The two together were less than $40 and I got them online at Showcase. Actually they were $39.98 and I needed to spend $40 to get free shipping so we ordered him a third car that isn't nearly as fun as these two!
I bought this set of little Care Bear figurines before last Christmas but had planned to keep them and give them to her this year, BUT as soon as I saw Jenn's idea I knew I had to open them up for these photos, and man am I ever glad I did. These couldn't have turned out any better!
Once again I'm surprised with how Jenn can work her magic. This part of the shoot was definitely the hardest cause Kennedy is very fast and very busy these days, but Jenn clearly got some good shots in amongst me chasing K and her continually knocking down the Care Bears!
SO...if you're in the PR area...book this session with Jenn Parkin Photography!! You won't regret it I guarantee that! These are the kind of photos I know I'll look back on forever and remember them at the ages they are now, with their favorite toys. I love them!
So James had his joint birthday party with Cooper on Saturday and we did a super easy hockey/playground party at the boys school. The kids that wanted to play hockey all lined up in the court to pick teams and Coop and James got to be team captains.
I rushed over to take some pictures and the next thing I hear is James saying "oh come on, I'm obviously going to pick Barrows, you come play with me little brother!" He literally picked his little brother to be on his team before he picked any of his big kid friends!!
I thought my heart would burst as my eyes filled with tears seeing how excited Jordie was that his brother picked him first. He only lasted a few minutes in the game before he left crying because he got hit or something but it was such a heart warming moment for me to know that even though they drive each other completely crazy that they truly always have each others backs. When I asked James later why he chose his brother he replied with "well because I just love him and he's my family".
Another great brother moment happened this weekend when the boys had a chance to sit in a big fancy ATV dune buggy thing in the back of a big truck. Jordie got to sit in the drivers seat first and he was so excited but within about a minute he climbed over to the drivers seat and yelled "come on James, you come in too!" I said it's okay Jordie you can have a few more minutes before you have to let him have a turn, and he replied with "no way, he's the big brother and he should be the driver!" It was so cute how excited they were to do it together.
They really do just love each so much, even if a lot of the time all I hear is "MOM....James/Jordie did....." I suppose the days will come where I will miss the bickering and tattling on each other but for now I'm gonna grin and bear it and hope that one day they read these posts and remember how much they love each other!
This has turned into one of my favorite yearly posts to do and this year is no exception. I love hearing James's thoughts on different things and will continue to do these posts for as long as he'll let me!
What is your full name:Alfred James Barrows If you could change your name what would you change it to:I would change it to...Freddy Alfred Jr. How old are you right now: 6 What did you do for your last birthday: Sports birthday Where and with who: Cooper Lawry and at Assumption gym Your favorite things - Snack: Peanut butter and apple Drink: Orange juice Vegetable: Carrots Fruit: Apples TV show: Ninjago Movie: The Incredibles Game: Monopoly Book: Blaze and the Monster Machines Toy: My favorite toy is....cars Animal: My favorite animal is the king of the forest which is the Lion Holiday: Halloween Restaurant: A&W Color: Red
What do you love best about - Me: That you are sweet and kind Your Dad: That he's very smart into sports Your Brother: That he's very loving to me and he is very kind and loving Your Nana: That she is very nice and loving too and caring Your Papa: Is that he's very capable in sports too Diesel: That he's a very hearting and kind dog...very nice.
The coolest person on earth is: Meee
When you're outside what is your favorite thing to do:Play soccer
What thing are you the very best at:Playing hockey
When you were little what was your favorite thing to do:It was to crawl
Where would you like to go on vacation this year: Disneyland
What do you want to be when you grow up to be an adult: I want to be...I will be....a VIU contractor
Here are some new questions for James this year (cause I was dying to hear his responses)
Where is the most wonderful place you've ever been? Our house
What's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to you? I love you
If you were invisible for a day, what would you do? I would just go around, doing stunts and no one can see me, and I'm dangerous and no one can see me.
What is the worst smell in the world? A skunk
What makes you cry? When people die
What are you scared of? I am scared of really scary shadows
What is your favorite song? Gulf War
What is your favorite memory? My favorite memory is when Papa took me out to the golfing range
If you could, what type of animal would you be? I would be a cheetah
Who is your best friend? Cooper Lawry
What is your favorite thing to do with family? Have family dinner with you guys
What is the most important rule? Be good and listen
If you had a million dollars, what would you spend it on? Toys
If Diesel could talk, what would he say? I love you James
If you had super powers, what would they be? They would be laser powers and speeding fast power like the Flash
What's the best thing about being a kid? Is that you're young and you get to play with all your friends at school
What is something that you don't understand about grown-ups? Is that they can eat really big bites but sometimes they have really low voices
What is your favorite word? Why? Love because we care about everyone who is in the earth...we care.
What do you dream about when you sleep? I dream about having big things and having you guys with me forever
What 3 words would you use to describe our family? Fun, funny and caring
What's something you'd like to learn how to do? How to do a back flip and front flip
If you had to give away all of your toys but one, which one would you keep? My Lego
What's the hardest thing you've ever had to do? The hardest thing? Is....go through writing books, that's really hard!
What does your 6 year old self want to tell the world? That I'm a very good boy and very caring boy and I'm very tough and smart.
Here's my first attempt at a question and answer conversation with Jordie. Let's just say next year I'll make sure to do it not at the end of the day, and not with his brother around to "help" him!
What is your full name:Dordie Dudas Barrows (translation: Jordie Douglas Barrows)
How old are you right now: Free (while holding up 3 fingers) What did you do for your last birthday: Oh I don't know. What kind of party did we have: A Paw Patrol one Where were we: at the party....at Nana's home Your favorite things - Snack: Bananas and oranges Drink: milk, and orange juice and water Vegetable: cucumber and carrot Fruit: Fruit...I already told you it. Bananas and oranges and apples TV show: Paw Patrol and Blaze and the Monster Machines Movie: Pirate Paw Patrol Book: The puppy one Toy: Ryder and Zuma and Skye Holiday: Holiday? I prefer Halloween Restaurant: Timbits....so Tim Hortons?.....yeah I love that one Color: Blue and pink and purple
What do you love best about - Me: When I miss you why I love you Daddy: When I be with him, and be with you and James James: When we snuggle...that makes me happy. Your Nana: When I snuddle her. Your Papa: When I snuddle him too. Diesel: When I snuddle him. That's what you love best about everyone: Yeah
A few more random questions that I chose for him to answer (he wasn't super into this little exercise so I kept it brief) I'm sure next year will be awesome! What thing are you the very best at:When I play video games (which is hilarious because he doesn't play video games usually!) What do you want to be when you grow up to be an adult: A big brother (well this is an adorable answer so I decided to quit while I was ahead and move on to James!)
Today James had a tree planting class field trip and although I was able to go for a little bit of it I was not able to ride on the school bus with him there and back. And not to mention the school bus was more than 30 minutes late so in the end I only actually got to participate for around 40 minutes before I had to leave. And when I did go to leave to get to work he was sad and said he didn't want me to go...and gave me a huge hug that made my heart hurt.
Then after school I called Papa to check in on the boys and asked James if he was practicing his Student Creed for karate. Papa said he was doing it and had in fact nailed it on his first try and was hoping he could get tested on it today during class. Then the dreaded words that no mother wants to hear "mom, are you able to come to karate today to watch me?" I literally felt my heart break in two and even thinking about it brings tears to my eyes. I would love nothing more than to see him doing something that he loves so much and has been working so hard on, but I just couldn't get away today after starting late because of the morning field trip. I wish that I could make it to everything that he does, but I just can't, and I knew that when I signed him up for it, but it's still hard. I was reminded today by my sister when I was upset about it that at least he has people that love him and support him that are there watching him...and that is what he will remember, not that I couldn't go. I know how lucky I am that my parents have committed to helping us get him to karate two days a week because without them it would be a sport that he just wouldn't be able to participate in and we are grateful that he can, because I know he is getting so much out of it.
I'm not sure if it's just a subtle shift I'm feeling because I'm pregnant and hormonal but I've noticed some changes in my boys the past week or so. Jordie has told me a few times that he doesn't want me to go to work, or he doesn't want to go to school or that he's going to miss me a lot when I'm gone to work which he never seemed to care about before. I don't know whether he just senses his little world is going to change, or what it is, but I'm definitely noticing it. And with James, I think the hard thing is that he KNOWS how much his world is going to change, and as much as he's excited about the new baby, I'm sensing that it's weighing on him too.
Now for the other side of it...times when my heart just wants to burst wide open with love. I called and talked quickly after school and the very first thing out of James's mouth was "how is the baby doing today Mom?" and Jordie this morning asked me if he could give the baby a kiss good morning and say hi. They are just too cute and even though I know their worlds are going to change drastically with a new sibling, I have so much faith in the little men that they are that they are going to rise to the occasion and be the best big brothers in the world.
So, this post is really all about the mom guilt that I feel. I feel like I have to work to support our family, but I also wish I could be there for everything for my boys. I know how fortunate I am to be able to be there when I can because I know other mom's who can't. My job is relatively flexible and with some pre-planning and help from my coworkers and boss I'm going to be able to go to watch James's karate sometimes, which I know will make both of us very happy! I think all parents feel some guilt about what they can't do, but I hope that other parents can look at what they can do and try to focus on that instead...I know it's what I'm trying to do!
I needed some extra snuggles tonight so I suggested a bedtime Blaze episode all together in
mom and dad's bed. I loved every second of the extra quiet time with my two loves!
Yes it's true...the Barrows Family is growing again! James and Jordie are happy to announce that we are gaining a new family member sometime in late April or early May. My official due date is May 1 but with a planned c-section I doubt they will let me/make me go right to that date.
We were so excited (and very impatient) to tell the boys but decided early on to wait until after our first ultrasound to tell them with a very special photo shoot with one of my besties and favorite photographers ever, the very talented Jenn Parkin Photography! I love these photos and couldn't be happier with how this moment was captured. Side note: I know I rave about Jenn quite a bit but she is really that wonderful, and I'm not just saying that because she's my friend. Case in point, once I got these photos from her on Monday afternoon I bugged her that night for close to an hour to make little tweaks to a few things so they were just perfect. I am a terrible friend and even worse photo client but she was an absolute champ as both a friend and photographer this weekend and just totally stepped up to help me out to be able to share this awesome news with our friends on this blog and on FB.
I struggled to decide which picture to use as the first one, but this close cropped one of the boys and their bears and big brother books just won out in the end!
The boys were hungry and tired and not super into taking more photos but these ones still turned out cute I think! In fact when we first asked James to sit down beside us so we could tell him about the baby and he spotted Jenn get her camera out he started whining and saying "more photos, I thought we were done with photos already!"
They really were such good sports about all of this!
Loved these signs so much!
This was an idea I had seen so many times but still really wanted to do it anyways! These were the ones I was being very OCD about and Jenn changed them all for me a few times and now I love them! I originally just wanted the years below our feet but she added the names and I think it's cute!
Here are photos from when and how we told the boys. We all sat together and had them watch the ultrasound videos of the baby and asked them if they knew what it was.
Me: Guess what it is?
James: A baby.
Me: Guess where that baby is?
James: Where?
Me: That baby is in mommy's belly.
James: That's me?
Me: No, that's a new baby! We're having another baby!
Jordie: Oh holy heck
James: Yay!
This is the moment when James got it
And you can see just how excited he was when he realized it was really true. Jordie is still looking at the picture of the baby on the screen and this is probably right when he's saying his awesome "oh holy heck" line.
Asking me when the baby is going to come out and declaring that it was "another brother" and that he wanted it to be a boy.
I was expecting hugs and kisses, but I did get an excited arm grab. Jordie really didn't understand quite what was happening.
Asking Jordie what he thought of it all
James stood up and was excited to realize he's going to be a "double" big brother
No idea what is actually happening here but it's totally random and casual and I love it. Watch the video below and maybe you can figure it out from there!
Here's the video of how it all went down! I'm so thankful that my brother Ben was able to come and video this moment for us because I really wanted to always have it.
And here's the video my brother Chris took of Nana and Papa finding out by watching the video of the boys finding out. It was a cute moment for sure and we were so glad to finally be telling everyone, especially my mom and dad! I really wanted to video tape their reaction but got super frazzled when Jordie just about ruined it when he ran into the house and told Olivia "my mommy is having a baby" but thankfully Nana was asleep in her chair and Papa was in his den and didn't hear him. Then we had them crowd into Nana's chair and watch it. The moment she realized I said the baby was in mommy's belly you can tell my mom totally got it! PS; If you had any doubts about whether my mom and I would cry...we totally did.
Here is a photo and two videos from our ultrasound on October 7 (baby is just over 10 weeks old)
Beautiful flowers from Chris & Teresa and the kids.
Now here's the back story of how we got here. It started way back on May 26, 2013 and Jordie was not yet even 3 days old. I sent this FB message to Jim...and then see our responses to each other. Notice it took him a whole day to respond to me and clearly another 30 hours later had me questioning myself after a disastrous night of no sleep in the hospital with a newborn!!
Kim Barrows - May 26, 2013 - 12:03am
I don't think I'm done having babies yet! I tried going to sleep an hour ago but all I could think about was how we could make it work a few years down the road to have just 1 more! I know I'm crazy but so so so in love with this little guy, and my other two J's at home!
love you
Jim Barrows - May 27, 2013 - 8:45am
WE'LL SEE
Kim Barrows - May 27, 2013 - 8:46am
Hahahahahahaha I take it back after last night.
We didn't really talk about this again until Jordie was around a year old and the conversations started about whether we would or wouldn't try to have another baby. We were drowning in baby toys, gear and clothing and we needed to make a decision about what we wanted to do, sell it all or reorganize to keep for the future. It was a conversation that we had over and over again over several months. During this time Jim was away working in camp and we both had many thoughts about what was the best for our whole family.
I felt really strongly that I wanted another child, whereas Jim felt really strongly that he was good with being done and was happy with just our two healthy and very busy little boys. I had a friend tell me something once and it seemed to haunt me. She said "you will never regret the kids you do have, but you may regret the ones you don't have." It was exactly how I felt...and I was scared to wake up 5 years down the road to this crushing feeling of regret at not having more kids. I didn't want to live with that regret and I didn't want to resent Jim for not understanding my dream. Jim understood where I was coming from and after hearing my thoughts and feelings about it he agreed that we would try for another baby around the time that Jordie turned 2. He knew that he would never have the financial burden of our family all on his shoulders because we would always work as a team to financially support our family. I have never intended to be a stay at home mother and I know that with both of our incomes together we will always make it work, although we are also realistic enough to acknowledge that there is no way that we could financially give as much to three kids as we could have to just two. And as much as some days that makes me sad to realize that our boys could miss out on something, I also personally know the love and joy of having two siblings and I think it will be a wonderful life experience for the boys and I don't think they will suffer because of our decision to give them another sibling.
Shortly after we decided that we were going to expand our family we were hit with a major curve ball. Jim got laid off from his job and I thought my hopes and dreams of another baby were over. But then the opportunity came up for him to go back to school and start a new career. I was so damn proud of him and even more excited when he said he was still willing to try for another baby. Jim loves being a dad more than anything and I know that even though he was probably scared about the future, he was also confident that together as a team we would be okay with adding another one to our crazy crew.
In September 2015 right when Jim started his carpentry course at VIU we started trying to get pregnant. And surprisingly to both of us, it just didn't happen like it had before. That first month I did feel like I was pregnant and then was heartbroken to discover I wasn't. When we tried with the boys it happened the first month both times so when it didn't this time I was shocked and sad. My plans to have my babies all 3 years apart just wasn't going to happen, so I adjusted my thoughts and just kept hoping for the best. A few months later in January I was sure I was finally pregnant and although my period was late I again discovered that it hadn't happened. I guess being 6 years older than when I first got pregnant had impacted my fertility at least to some degree. We talked to our family doctor about it but we also knew that we weren't prepared to do any testing or take extreme measures to have another baby. To us, that just wasn't in our plans and we were both really confident in that decision.
It was around April that we really started talking seriously about how much longer we were willing to try for. James was about to turn 6 and a month later Jordie would be 3. It weighed heavily on me that when James was turning 3 I was hugely pregnant and Jordie was about to be born...and here we were still not pregnant. If I had gotten pregnant in September when we first started trying I would have been only 2 months away from meeting our newest little love.
During one particularly hard conversation Jim said something that made me feel better and ready to move forward. He said "it's okay sweetie, because at least we tried, so you don't have to regret anything." I can truly say that I was definitely coming around to the idea that we had done the best we could and it just hadn't happened so it was time to move on with our life. The more time that passed and the more frustrated I became (and the more independent that Jordie got) I started to feel like that saying that had haunted me before just didn't anymore. I knew I would always be able to tell myself that we had really tried and it just hadn't been meant to be for us. I started to focus on what our life would be like and all the fun things we could do as a little happy family of four, but still had a small ache in my heart when I pictured our family photos without another little one in them with us.
A week after deciding that we were good if it didn't happen I traveled to Alberta to meet my best friend's twin boys and that whole weekend I felt super queasy. I told her and her husband that I thought maybe I was pregnant. I came home feeling a little bit excited...and absolutely terrified because I had just talked myself into being good with being done so to be faced with this now seemed really overwhelming and scary to me. I rushed home to take a pregnancy test as soon as I got off the ferry. It came back positive and I was shocked and couldn't wait to tell Jimmy. With only a few minutes to spare before t-ball I quickly got Jordie involved so I could send this picture to Jim via text message that night after the boys were in bed. When he got the picture I could tell he was shocked and wasn't really sure what to think but was doing his best to put a happy and brave face on for me because I was clearly upset and scared.
Isn't he just the cutest? (And he has absolutely no idea what his shirt or his sign says!) I would NEVER have attempted this with James! :)
The very next morning after getting a very clear positive pregnancy test the night before I started bleeding. I had no idea what I felt in that moment. I was so sad, but also relieved too which made me feel like worst person/mother in the whole world. I was in the middle of a stupidly busy month full of t-ball, work, strata and house sitting so thankfully I didn't have a lot of time to think about it and just moved on with our plan that we were done and ready to move forward. In mid-July we bought our new trailer because we were "moving into the next phase of our lives" and were planning to enjoy it in the years to come with our two very happy and active outdoorsy boys. We told everyone who asked that we were happy to be done and were ready to start selling off our stuff, even selling a ton of our toys to our daycare center!
Fast forward to the end of August and we were going camping with our friends and I just didn't feel good and wasn't sure why. I counted back the days to my last period and I realized "holy shit...what if I'm pregnant?" I woke up on Saturday morning and just burst into tears. Jim held me and said "it is what it is and we'll wait to take a test to be sure." We talked with Sean and Ash that weekend about it because I just needed to vent and to hear that it was all going to be okay. Luckily they are the kind of friends that were wonderful about it. They were excited enough for us that it helped me get passed my absolute terror at the idea. I had envisioned our years of camping with them and our perfect little mix of kids at the same ages and the thought of now throwing a baby into that made me so sad.
We went home on Sunday afternoon and immediately took a test and before I could even finish washing my hands I looked down and saw the second pink line appear...bright pink! There was no denying that it was positive. I had hoped to let Jim read the test and then tell me the results and was super surprised to see it turn so quickly. He came in and looked at it and then we just laid on our bed and talked for almost an hour while the boys were downstairs watching a movie. I sobbed and Jim was, as he usually is, my absolute rock. He said we were going to be okay and that we were going to make the best of it. He cheerily said that our next phase was just going to look a little differently than we first thought. I'm really happy now that we bought a little bit bigger of a trailer because we are definitely going to need it next summer with a baby and all the shit that they come with and in the many years to come with 3 kids in it!
For anyone out there asking...how did you not suspect you were pregnant if you weren't preventing it from happening? Well, my answer is that we were stupid and just kept telling ourselves that it hadn't happened in the 9 months we had tried so it certainly wasn't going to happen by random chance once we stopped trying. Everyone that I told that I was done trying said "it will probably happen now that you are done trying" and I would just giggle and say "nope, I doubt it." Just the week before we found out we were expecting again Jim and I had talked about getting an appointment booked for a referral to the doctor for Jim's vasectomy so clearly we really had no idea that possibly we were actually pregnant. Of course I knew it was a possibility because we all know how babies are made but I really and truly just didn't think it was in the cards for us :)
We found out we were expecting at just around 5 weeks and went to the doctor for a confirmation just a few days later. He did nothing because my regular doctor is an idiot but he did refer me to a wonderful local OB-GYN at our clinic and I couldn't wait to meet her. My appointment wasn't until just over 8 weeks but as soon as I met her I knew everything would be okay and I was in good hands. As I will be having a repeat c-section she won't actually be delivering the baby but she will follow me through my pregnancy and will be there to take care of baby at the birth.
I've never been very good at keeping secrets like this one. Both times I was pregnant before I think we told our families and friends within a few days of finding out. This was a whole different ball game this time. Jim and I both felt very strongly that we didn't want to tell very many people until after we had told the boys, and we didn't want to tell them until we were close to the 12 week mark, just in case. Luckily they do a dating ultrasound between 10-13 weeks so we hoped it would happen closer to the 10 weeks so after we knew everything was okay we could finally spill the beans to everyone. Plus, my mom was going to Europe and I really wanted to tell her before she left!
The only people that knew before the boys were our friends Sean and Ash who we were camping with, and one of my closest girlfriends in Ontario as she was going through some stuff and I thought she could use a smile one day. I found it so hard every day to not tell everyone else. I found myself avoiding my parents and other family members and spent almost no time with my friends because I was just dying to share our news! Every time I would go home and whine to Jim that I just really wanted to tell someone, he would remind me of our decision and wanting to wait. I was really regretting our decision but I also really wanted that moment to be special when we did tell James and Jordie and I knew that by waiting and telling our family and friends after that was what felt right to both of us so I stuck with it even though it was really hard.
We had our ultrasound on Friday, October 7 and saw a healthy, growing, kicking little baby and at that point things felt so much more real and we really couldn't wait to tell the boys. I literally felt like I was bursting at the seams waiting for our photo shoot on Saturday (which ended up being pushed to Sunday because it poured rain all day on Saturday!) As soon as the photo shoot was done we rushed to McDonalds to treat the boys for lunch and then straight to Nana and Papa's to tell them. Once they knew, we went crazy telling everyone else so many of our friends and all of our family will already know before this blog post goes live!
The first trimester has been a bit rough, but mainly because keeping the secret has been killing me. SO many times I wanted to just tell someone, anyone, to get it off my chest, but I kept firm in wanting our boys to know first (or as close to first as possible). We told Jenn and Bill the night before the ultrasound so I could make plans with Jenn for the photo reveal for that weekend and I told Ash back on Labour Day weekend because she outright asked me a few days before and I had lied to her via text and I felt bad. And I wanted to have one person in on it that I could whine to in the coming 6 weeks. Poor girl had to endure more than a few whiny text messages and phone calls! Oh, and I also told my brother Ben when I was in Vancouver a few weeks back because I was miserable and just wanted to barf and was so tired of not telling anyone, so I told him too! Thankfully he knew so was able to come and take the video for us on the reveal day!
So, there you have it...another Barrows baby is on the way. Do you think it's another crazy little boy or will we finally have a little girl to even out the numbers a little bit in our household? We are pretty sure that this time we want to find out baby's gender but instead of finding out in the ultrasound we will have the tech write it on a paper and will give to our friends who will help us plan a big gender reveal party to be held hopefully in January. If I'm not going to find out privately in the delivery room with just Jim then I want to find out surrounded by all those that love us and our kids. I think it will be a really special moment for all of us and definitely one that we'll remember forever.
